“Friendship is the hardest thing in the world to explain. It's not something you learn in school. But if you haven't learned the meaning of friendship, you really haven't learned anything." ~Muhammad Ali 
Circa 1984

The Discipline of Friendship

The year was 1984. It was the last day of summer before 8th grade began. I had just cried my eyes out for several hours due to my lack of friends. It was time to dust myself off and enter the problem solving phase. 

I took a two-pronged approach: Prayer and Hair. I prayed that God would give me a friend and I decided that a slicked back hairdo would win me some friends as well.

The failure was epic on both counts. 

I kept at it though and eventually had a close group of friends by the end of my high school years. To this day, I don’t think there is anything more important to my personal and spiritual growth than friendship.

Emerson said, “I do not wish to treat friendships daintily, but with the roughest courage. When they are real, they are not glass threads or frost-work, but the solidest thing we know.”

Friendship matters to me. I’m sure it matters to you. 

Cultivating, creating, building, and having friendships can be more powerful than therapy, and more influential than even coaching. I’m not talking about simply having a friend. I’m talking about intentionally creating  space for growth with one or more friends. I’m talking about making friendship a DISCIPLINE.

A discipline is something that we CAN do right now in order to make an impact on something we can’t do yet but want to be able to do in the future. 
My growth as a human is inextricably linked to the discipline of friendship. It is in these intentional spaces that I:
  • Was called out to finally go to therapy in my late 20s—kick starting deep and permanent healing.
  • Discovered the courage to start my own business and did so in 2008.
  • Processed the joys and pains of my significant other relationships.
  • Caught the first glimpse of my life’s purpose.
  • Saw myself fully through another man’s eyes and found myself as worthy.
A friendship is a safe AND courageous space. Safe because of trust and ability to talk about your whole life—and courageous because we can take risks to fully live our purpose. A friendship that creates this safe and courageous space can propel us into our truest selves.

My challenge to you is ask yourself how intentional have you been in creating the discipline of friendship in your life? What do you want and what are you going to do about it?

I’ve also started a series of FREE webinars called Practice Makes People. Next Tuesday is about the Discipline of Friendship and I’d love to have you join me. Last week we introduced the topic of The Core Disciplines: Celebration and Solitude. If you missed it, go to the link and download the recording. Check out the entire series here or click on any of the titles in the sidebar to sign up for any of the FREE webinars.



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Practice Makes People

FREE Webinar Series

Lunchtime web-based workshop about practicing to become the person you really are.

Do you want to be more effective at work? In your relationships? You know. I know. It's not them. It's you. It's me. We need to try a different strategy. It's time to put ourselves into Brain Bootcamp.  

Come join us most weeks as we talk about a different phase of training. Details on entire series here.

Each webinar is FREE and has limited space so sign-up right away by clicking on the title. 

October 20th
Finding Community
The Discipline of Friendship

October 27th
Practicing Presence in the Now
The Discipline of Presence

November 3rd
The Hardest Discipline
Seeking Silence

November 16th
Not Getting What You Want Gets You What You Want
The Discipline of Fasting (not just food)

November 24th
Danger High Voltage
Taking Responsibility for Your Choices
The Discipline of Authenticity

December 1st
No Trespassing 
Setting Clear Boundaries 
The Discipline of Self-Love

December 8th
Discovering Your Purpose
The Discipline of Growth

December 15th
Making Friends with Failure
The Discipline of Risk Taking

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Oh--and give you a little butt kicking too!

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--An initial two-hour discovery session is included for your first session.
--Two powerful 45-minute sessions monthly for three months.
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Reply to ken@authenticdevelopment.com, call 847-873-9559 or just make an appointment at https://authenticdev.youcanbook.me/ to get started. 

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