Authentic is the Opposite of Codependent

Posted Tuesday, December 04, 2012



Did you grow up in a dysfunctional family? Me too.

One thing that I think is true for all of us—we never completely drop the roles that we developed in order to effectively give and get love, how to feel safe, how to make people love us. We learn what is OK to say, what our parents want from us, and how to feel good.

I for one played the role of the "hero" or "rescuer" for much of my life. When I saw someone in need—well it was my job to make sure that I met their need.

Eventually, this doesn't work. The role I created to make sure I got my needs met in the end wasn't going to be able to help others. As soon as I stopped getting what I needed, I had to either pick another codependent role or another person from whom to get my needs met. I did both of those things with lots of consequences.

How do we stop living in our codependence? How do we choose to create something different for our life?  Read More »

Am I Deluding Myself?

Posted Tuesday, August 14, 2012

"Am I deluding myself."

This is a common question. For me. For my clients.

It's a strong voice of doubt in my head.

There is really no way to know about how things are going to turn out. Yet, we try very hard make it turn out exactly how we expect it to.

  • We want to know without a doubt that he or she will love me forever; so we tie the knot. 
  • We want to know that we will always have a place to rest our head; so we sign the paperwork on the thirty year mortgage.
  • We want financial security; so we go to college and get a good job that allows us to save up some money.

Here's the thing:  Read More »



Check out our last 6 eNewsletters:

November 4, 2016--Crossing the Continental Divide (Both Literally and Metaphorically)


May 13, 2016-Are You Embracing Your Goo?

April 6, 2016--Micromanagement is Good Management


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