10 Ways to Save Your Life

Posted Tuesday, April 17, 2012


I was recently on a plane and the flight attendant spoke up about the safety information she was about to share. She said, "It is better to know this information and not need it than to need it and not know it. This information could save your life." Good point!

Here is a list of "truths" that may save your life—specifically save you from living a life that EVEN YOU believe is not worth living.

1. Your life, Your choice.

You create your own life. Period. No one else is responsible for what your life looks like today. Not your parents, not your significant other, not your boss. You choose the trajectory of your life every day and if you want it to look differently—you MUST choose a different trajectory. Your life, your choice.

2. The only person you can rescue is you.

I'm surrounded by clients and friends that are amazing at helping others. This is no surprise because we tend to attract people like ourselves. Rescuing others is a trap. It can't be done. We do it. It feels awesome. We must focus on saving ourselves. The only person you can rescue is you.

3. What you avoid, what you can't be with—it is actually running your life.

When we can't be with silence—our need for activity runs our actions. When we can't be with abandonment, how we interact with those who may abandon us gets affected. Learn to be with what you can't be with. What you avoid is running your life.

4. Your truest knowings are in your body—not your brain.

You already know this is true. Your gut tells you the answer long before you figure it out with your head. Our art comes from our body. Our dancing. Our musicality. Our poetry comes from the places of deep emotion. Slow down long enough to experience what your body is telling you. Your truest knowings are in your body.

5. Guilt and shame are the worst motivators for decision making.

It's funny—isn't it—that we constantly choose to do things out of guilt only to eventually resent the people we are trying to keep happy. Shame—negative self talk—keeps us from entering the life we really want time and time again. What would it be like if we just decided to stop listening to those voices for a day? Choose something besides guilt and shame to motivate your decisions. My suggestion: love.

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My Passionate Plea

Posted Wednesday, April 11, 2012



I want to be connected to something bigger than myself.

What am I connected to beyond myself:
My kids
Real-ness in the world
What everyone really wants--love
 
What's missing?
Deep abiding relationships
People moving towards their "actual" wants
People are moving too fast
People are killing themselves
People are lying to themselves
 
And
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RIDING THE UNICORN

Posted Wednesday, January 04, 2012

Imagine you in your home, winding down from a long day and the door bell rings. You open the door and there is a solitary unicorn standing there. You are understandably surprised. You are shocked when the unicorn starts speaking to you and in english says, "Get on! Let's go for a ride!"  

What's your response? Of course you are going to get on the unicorn. You are either in a dream or it's a chance of a lifetime—so no matter what—you are going to go for a ride. 

Is there anything magical in your life? Anything that has you in awe? Is there anywhere in your life where you experience unbridled joy?

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Do You Smell Something?

Posted Thursday, May 19, 2011


So, what’s the stench in your life? The one you don’t notice? What’s the fragrance in your life—the one that only other people smell?

Think of it this way. Have you ever come back from vacation and noticed the odor of your house? I’m not talking about forgetting to take out the garbage—I’m talking about that special smell that other people know as the fragrance of your home but you rarely smell because it is yours.

You also have a way of looking at life that is uniquely yours—or unique to your community. That smell or odor or fragrance—whatever you label it—that’s a piece of you. That’s your perspective on life.

Once upon a time—not long ago—my odor contained quite a bit of judgment of others, better than-ness, and self-righteousness. I wouldn’t be surprised if the odor still lingers although I am working hard to exchange it for inclusivity, friendship, and authenticity.

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Stop Waiting For It

Posted Tuesday, April 05, 2011



So, I was on vacation last week. Family vacation. We went to California and I re-discovered San Diego and we spent several days enjoying the sun in LA. We had some really fun times but the best day was when I rented a road bike and spent the afternoon riding up the Pacific coast. I love to bike. I love the sun. I love the ocean. I love a long afternoon to myself. I couldn’t have asked for a better day!

Another thing I did on vacation was pick up a book called The 4-Hour Workweek by Timothy Ferriss. My initial thought about this book was: “Who thinks that they can get all their work done in four hours a week? Who really thinks that they would still have a job if they tried to pull that off?” Those thoughts changed when I started reading.

 I was drawn into the book because it spoke truth right from the beginning about how most people that I know are experiencing their lives. A  couple of quotes:

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