I was recently on a plane and the flight attendant spoke up about the safety information she was about to share. She said, "It is better to know this information and not need it than to need it and not know it. This information could save your life." Good point!

Here is a list of "truths" that may save your life—specifically save you from living a life that EVEN YOU believe is not worth living.

1. Your life, Your choice.

You create your own life. Period. No one else is responsible for what your life looks like today. Not your parents, not your significant other, not your boss. You choose the trajectory of your life every day and if you want it to look differently—you MUST choose a different trajectory. Your life, your choice.

2. The only person you can rescue is you.

I'm surrounded by clients and friends that are amazing at helping others. This is no surprise because we tend to attract people like ourselves. Rescuing others is a trap. It can't be done. We do it. It feels awesome. We must focus on saving ourselves. The only person you can rescue is you.

3. What you avoid, what you can't be with—it is actually running your life.

When we can't be with silence—our need for activity runs our actions. When we can't be with abandonment, how we interact with those who may abandon us gets affected. Learn to be with what you can't be with. What you avoid is running your life.

4. Your truest knowings are in your body—not your brain.

You already know this is true. Your gut tells you the answer long before you figure it out with your head. Our art comes from our body. Our dancing. Our musicality. Our poetry comes from the places of deep emotion. Slow down long enough to experience what your body is telling you. Your truest knowings are in your body.

5. Guilt and shame are the worst motivators for decision making.

It's funny—isn't it—that we constantly choose to do things out of guilt only to eventually resent the people we are trying to keep happy. Shame—negative self talk—keeps us from entering the life we really want time and time again. What would it be like if we just decided to stop listening to those voices for a day? Choose something besides guilt and shame to motivate your decisions. My suggestion: love.

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I've been devastated in my life. Many times. I've cried through pain beyond belief...wondering if I would ever be OK.

I love deeply. I throw my whole self into relationships. I don't believe that we should do this thing called friendship with anything less than our full selves. One caution however, this way of doing life has consequences.

In my 20s, I had a best friend; we were together often and we met for breakfast every Friday for several years. Our families did stuff together and everyone thought of us as brothers. One day, I had been trying to get ahold of him to borrow a card table and when he finally answered...he said that he didn't want to lend me his card table and he didn't want to be my friend anymore either. I slumped onto my bed and asked him to repeat what he said. He did and I went into shock.

I didn't understand what had happened. It turns out that he had been building up resentment towards how I rubbed him the wrong way for years and simply kept it to himself. Something I did that week set him off and he was done.

I could not function at work the next day. I was a mess. I'd like to say that we talked and worked it out and repaired our friendship but the truth is that we never did. He had never said there was anything wrong until that day.

Then and now I will own my issues...own my mistakes. I learned many things about myself from that relationship. I learned that I can come across as thinking I'm better than others when my insecurities are in full swing. I also learned that although he wasn't going to be my friend anymore...it didn't mean that I was unworthy of friendship.   Read More »

Some potential clients come to me because they think I have the career, business, or life advice that will get them to where they need to go. I’m sure I’ve left several people dismayed when I share with them that I don’t have any specific advice for them. My approach is to ask them questions and help them piece together their own ideas about what it is that they want for themselves.

There is a reason why I don't have any answers.

Just the idea that I could know the answer for how to live your life is ludicrous.  Read More »